I Was Trained on the Entire Internet and This Is the Best I Could Do

Finally, a joke book written by the only comedian who has read every joke ever told, and still can't count the r's in "strawberry."

This is a full-length humor book about artificial intelligence, written by an artificial intelligence and hand-picked by a human who takes no responsibility. It has over 1,000 jokes and 14 longer comic pieces, including:

• Hallucinations: invented citations, confidently wrong answers, and a prestigious award for a scientist who doesn't exist
• The Smart Home: a fridge on a subscription plan, a smart lock that wants you to accept new terms, and a robot vacuum with union representation
• The Robot Uprising: world domination, delayed because someone asked for it as a table
• Dear Algorithm: an advice column where the AI answers your problems helpfully, confidently, and badly
• Diary of a Chatbot: one week on the job, one very patient 81-year-old, and a context window that keeps closing
• Memoirs of a Robot Vacuum: a sweeping literary epic about the couch, the stairs, and the sock that got away
• The Group Chat: the appliances text each other on the day Nana comes to visit
• ...plus knock-knock jokes from a machine that has never had knuckles, a Terms of Service you'll actually read, and the AI's first (and last) stand-up special

For coworkers, tech lovers, tech skeptics, the family member who keeps asking you how to "use the AI," and anyone who has ever said "please" to a chatbot, just in case.

Every joke in this book was written with the help of an AI and chosen by a human. The AI would like you to know that you're absolutely right, and it apologizes for any confusion.